There are people in our lives that seem to draw things out of us that no one else can. I’m not sure what it is, exactly, but I’m confident that it’s true. I even have this theory that there is some sort of “electricity” that is exchanged between people. Kind of like an aura, or what some call their spirit. It is similar to the Force of Star Wars, only you can’t manipulate it, it has rules that can’t be bent or broken. It won’t make you fly – like the Matrix. You can’t make things move – like Star Wars.
I like to think about it this way: why does the energy in the room change when someone walks in or someone leaves? Why can certain people make us talk about things that we wouldn’t tell anyone else (sometimes complete strangers)? Why do we like or not like certain people for no good, obvious reason other than “just because,” or “bad/good feelings or vibes”? Isn’t it strange?
I believe there is something spiritual within us that connects us to other people in an electrical fashion. I don’t think it can be measured or examined. It will never be scientifically proven, but I do believe it’s there. That’s why we connect with certain people. That’s why someone can change our mood just by being near us. That’s why someone can pep us up without saying a word.
People in my life have been that way. In fact, I can name about a hand full of people that have come and gone that have had a profound (and positive) impact on my life. I remember one lady when I was in college – she was a bit older, but she made my funny side always come out. When we were together, we were quite the funny duo. We could have rivaled any Saturday Night Live skit. The same would be true of a couple of other people I knew in college. One guy in particular. His name is Dude.
Dude was athletically talented, smooth with the ladies, and black – everything that I wasn’t. Everyone that knew him spoke so highly of him that I actually avoided trying to be friends with him for a long time. But our energy pulled us together. We played on the basketball team together, and we became friends quickly. He would draw me out of any funk, usually physically removing me from my dorm room and then emotionally making me have fun everywhere we went. I used to say that he would make everything we did a post card moment. It was his way of grabbing life by the horns, never down, never a bad day. Not like me. I’m not saying he never had bad days; he just knew how to handle them. Very different than me.
I missed having Dude around for the last 15 years or so. We lost touch. Facebook didn’t exist back when we knew each other, and he wasn’t an early adopter of it. However, he has recently surfaced, and we managed to touch base. Last week we actually met for a drink. What a good time. Different than the old days, but the same energy. Even at 40 he got hit on by some random girls. (Really?!? Remind me to tell you about that one time we were at Cowboys Club in Big City, and what this one girl said to him.)
So we meet at a local restaurant. As is normal for me, I was in a funk. He pulled me out. He talked about old times, and about his plans for the near future. He wants to involve me in a new project. I’m sure I’ll give it a try, but I’m not expecting much (which I don’t believe is my negativity so much as my sense of reality). I hope this venture takes off, but I also know that what he’s trying to do is very difficult. I have had people include me (or speak of including me) in big plans, and 9 times out of 10 (or even less) have never amounted to anything. So I don’t get my hopes up any more. But I do still hope for the best. I really do.
So, I’m game. I’ll give it a try. That’s what Dude does for me. He gives me hope. Other people in my life try – some try real hard – just can’t quite accomplish that same positive impact on me. It’s just not the same. The energy isn’t there. I can’t buy what they’re selling. I can fake it, however. I’m very good at that. I can be happy, with a happy face, and a happy laugh, but inside I’m still as dead as always. It’s usually just fake.
I wish I had someone like Dude every day. I need that kind of emotional jump start. My wife, and others around me are emotional drains. I need jumper cables that charge me, not drain me.
Sad Stated Affairs 